Creativity Vitamin: Clean the Clutter

May 16, 2013 in Guest post, Thursday Writing, Tips and Suggestions, Writers by Janel Gradowski

A messy work space leads to a messy mind. You have heard some version of that phrase, haven’t you? Clearing the clutter from my writing space is something I make a point to do on a regular basis. I am really not a neat freak, I can happily ignore stacks of mail on the kitchen table or precariously stacked video game boxes on the entertainment center. The reason I regularly clean up my writing space is simple. I’m more productive. That is good enough for me to spend some quality time doing clutter control on a regular basis. A clean work space leads to a less-cluttered mind.

Don’t believe me? Imagine this scenario.

You are in the middle of writing a scene. You pause for a few seconds to ponder the perfect detail to add to your villain’s appearance. Your gaze wanders from your computer screen to a stack of unopened mail. Yes, most of it is junk mail, but there are bills in the pile that could be overdue. You abandon your writing to sort through mail. Clutter has claimed more victims. You and your WIP.

Have you ever written down notes for a project and then lost them? However, in your search through the mountains of paper on your desk you did discover some notes for another story. Notes that would’ve made that story much better, but it’s too late because it has already been published. Now you’re frustrated about two stories.

Maybe you have a favorite pen that you like to edit hard copies with. What happens if you sit down with a stack of pages to edit and you can’t find the pen? You could grab another one, but there’s also a good chance you’ll waste time searching for the coveted pen. There went a nice chunk of editing time.

So how do you get your writing space clean? If your desk is a huge mess, you can tackle your clean up in stages.

  • Throughout the work day when you need to take a break, clean up a few things.
  • Sort through one pile or area at a time.
  • Set up files to keep necessary items and always have your garbage can nearby.
  • Maybe buy, or make, some nice pen holders or boxes to organize notepads, paperclips, sticky notes, etc.
  • If you tend to keep your space neat anyway, make sure to set aside some time each week to do a clutter control sweep.
  • Don’t view the process as a household chore…think of it as a benefit to your writing life.

Are you ready to start cleaning up your writing space, or do you always keep it clean?

~ Janel Gradowski

 

*image copyright Janel Gradowski

 

Guest Post (6 Posts)

We would love to have more guest posts! Will you write one? If you have any ideas or proposals that you think would improve the public presence of FFDO please don’t hesitate to send them to either editor Estrella Azul or founder Jon Strother. You can contact Estrella at estrella.azul@fridayflash.org, and Jon at jmstro@fridayflash.org with your questions, comments, or suggestions.


5 Common Errors that Spell-Check Won’t Correct

May 9, 2013 in Thursday Writing, Tips and Suggestions by Dana Sitar

No matter how good technology gets, you’re always going to need an editor’s eye – -yours or someone else’s — to polish your writing. Spell-check won’t catch these glaring grammar mistakes and typos.

1. Typos

Spell-check will catch a lot of typos, because they result in misspellings. But what about when you accidentally typo a real word? The most common I see in published writing is and instead of an, but typos come in many varieties. Be careful what your hands do when you’re not paying attention.

2. Using the wrong homonym

Nothing gets under a writer’s skin more than seeing these common mistakes:

  • there instead of their or they’re
  •  your instead of you’re
  •  to instead of too or two
  • it’s instead of its
  • by instead of buy

3. Using the wrong word

affect is usually a verb.

effect is usually a noun.

BUT affect does NOT mean “to bring about” or “to cause (something) to happen”. That’s effect.

Ex: The effect of four years of experience was that I was able to effect progress in any organization, ultimately affecting my ability to gain further employment.

Others include then instead of than; and I often see pluralization mistakes like woman instead of women.

4. Misspelling a name

Spell-check doesn’t know all of the people you write about, but many of your readers will. Be sure to double-check the spelling of your subjects’ names, including the preferred capitalization and spacing for names like MacArthur or da Vinci. Don’t guess; it’s rude, and getting it wrong will annoy your subjects and your readers, and cut into your credibility.

5. Punctuation Errors

My spell-check is still uncomfortable when I use an em dash without surrounding spaces (OK by Chicago style); it gives me that glaring squiggly red line that forces me to search hard for a spelling mistake that isn’t there. I haven’t had any better luck with grammar-check for punctuation, so I’ve had to rely on real knowledge and a keen eye to ensure correct usage.

What common mistakes get under your skin as a writer or editor?

This post originally appeared at danasitar.com. Image by Matt Hampel (Creative Commons)

Take Part In A Senseless Challenge

May 2, 2013 in Challenge, Guest post, Thursday Writing, Writers by AM Harte

Badge for The Senseless Challenge

Badge for The Senseless Challenge

By A. M. Harte

May is NaShoStoMo!

Yes: that amusing acronym stands for National Short Story Month.

We of the #fridayflash community are united by our love of short stories, so it would be a shame to let this month pass by unnoticed.

As such, I’ve come up with a perfectly senseless writing challenge to celebrate the short story format AND help you hone your craft.

THE SENSELESS CHALLENGE: THE FACTS

  1. We have five senses.
  2. May has five Fridays.
  3. Each Friday is dedicated to one of the senses.
    • May 03: Sight
    •  May 10: Sound
    • May 17: Smell
    • May 24: Taste
    • May 31: Touch
  4. On each Friday, you post a #fridayflash about that sense.
  5. Tweet your story with the hashtag #flashsense (if you have twitter).

We’ll be kicking off the challenge tomorrow with “Sight”. You could post a flash about a ghost who can only see, but not hear or smell or feel or taste. Or you could write about a blind man, and how he sees without seeing.

There are no rules. You can take part for one week or all five. You can write about not having that week’s sense or only having it.

The aim of the challenge is to become more aware of how you use senses to convey description – and hopefully have fun too!

SOME SENSELESS PRIZES

At the end of May, I’m going to poll readers on which challenge story was their favourite – each author can enter a maximum of 5 times (once for each sense).

The author of the winning story wins a print copy of Hungry For You, plus THREE 1889 Labs e-books which delve in the short(er) story formats. The runner-up will win the e-books. Winners will be announced on June 10th.

SENSELESS PARTICIPATION

Help me make NaShoStoMo an international event!

Drop me a note on my blog to let me know you’re taking part… and roll up your sleeves for some senseless writing.

Happy flashing!

~ Anna Harte

Guest Post (6 Posts)

We would love to have more guest posts! Will you write one? If you have any ideas or proposals that you think would improve the public presence of FFDO please don’t hesitate to send them to either editor Estrella Azul or founder Jon Strother. You can contact Estrella at estrella.azul@fridayflash.org, and Jon at jmstro@fridayflash.org with your questions, comments, or suggestions.


May Holidays for the Literary Minded

April 25, 2013 in Celebration, Holidays = Inspiration, Thursday Writing, Writing Fun by Catherine Russell

Let’s face it. Some days just cry out for creativity. Aside from the more popular holidays, like Mother’s Day and Cinco de Mayo, the merry month of May is brimming with reasons to celebrate.

What April Fool’s Day is to clowns, the month of May is to bibliophiles.

#

May 3rd: Make a Book Day*

I’ve found several other days cited for making books also, including May 1st, but this one lands on Kite Day as well as Paranormal Day. So, take from that what you will. Perhaps make a book about possessed kites?

May 4th: Free Comic Book Day (first Saturday in May)

This day may possibly be the busiest holiday for my family, since we make a point of hitting as many comic books stores as we can. Participating stores give away copies of special edition comics printed just for the ‘holiday’, often with people dressing up as their favorite characters. And in addition to getting free stuff (who doesn’t love that?), it’s usually a great way to find new stores to haunt.

May 4th: Star Wars Day (In Los Angeles, May 25th in honor of the 1977 release of Star Wars)

May the Fourth be with you. Honestly, I didn’t make up the pun, but many bookstores hold special Star Wars themed events on this day(s). Why not take advantage?

May 5th: Cartoonist’s Day

Need I say more?

May 9th: Peter Pan Day

Celebrate the birthday of author James Barrie, creator of the beloved children’s classic, by indulging your inner child. Peter Pan can be downloaded free of charge courtesy of Project Gutenberg. Do you believe in fairies?

May 12th: Limerick Day (Edward Lear‘s birthday)

Read one or write some of your own!

May 14th: George Lucas Born

Have a cake or design a birthday themed story for the creator of Star Wars!

May 15th: L. Frank Baum

Read one of the Oz books or watch one of the movies; indulge your inner child… or maybe a child you know.

May 18th: O. Henry Pun Day

Hosted every May at the O. Henry Museum in Austin, Texas, the O. Henry Pun-Off World Championships feature punsters celebrating world play. Even if you aren’t in Texas, you can engage in a some of “the lowest and most groveling kind of wit (according to John Dryden).” Tweet, blog, or post your most witty and/or obnoxious homonyms and double entendres. After all, who doesn’t enjoy a little PUN and games?***

May 22: Sir Arthur Conan Doyle

Write a story, read one, indulge in some creative analytic thinking, or just call everyone ‘My dear, Watson,’ all day. But be sure to remember that this talented author wrote more than just the beloved Sherlock Holmes stories. The creator of this incredibly logical character was a spiritualist, but he also wrote The Lost World and a wealth of other adventure stories.

May 25th: Towel Day

Towel Day is a fan created holiday to honor the late author, Douglas Adams. In his famous series, The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, a towel is cited as being the most important thing an intersteller hitchhiker should never be without, so fans proudly wear a towel and/or take pictures of themselves with their towels, to show their love of a great series and a wonderful author.

May 25th: Nerd Pride Day or Geek Pride Day

I’ve never celebrated this particular holiday, having only recently discovered it, but I love this. Such notable institutions as Think Geek and Wired magazine have honored this day in the past, so be sure to look for cool stuff from them, or maybe just subscribe to a podcast like The Functional Nerds!** Nerdfighters.com is also a cool place for nerds to hang out and play.*****

May 31st: Walt Whitman’s Birthday

The author of Leaves of Grass left behind a poetic legacy. Honor the day of his birth by reading or listening to some of his work or creating some free verse poetry of your very own.****

#

Obviously, the reason that May is such a merry month for writers is the abundance of days to celebrate both our literary and cultural diversity. Be sure to keep something on you to catch your overflowing creativity. Go forth, grab a towel and a free comic, and celebrate to your heart’s content!

-

*Many of these holidays have different dates depending on the source, so I can’t attest to how “official” they are. However, do you really need an “official” reason to do something fun?

**In the interest of full disclosure, I do write book reviews for the Functional Nerds website, though I stand behind my recommendation. Their shows are always fun and entertaining.

***I had to do it.

****Both the text and audio of Leaves of Grass can be downloaded free of charge from Project Gutenberg as well as ManyBooks.net. I often turn to both these valuable resources for free ebooks.

*****Editor Estrella Azul couldn’t help but add this website to the nerdy mix.

Call for Article Submissions

April 18, 2013 in Dot Org, Submission Guidelines, Thursday Writing by JM Strother

We here at Friday Flash Dot Org are both proud and honored to be a part of the #FridayFlash community.

We have grown quite a bit since I started a little experiment on Twitter to explore how social media might be used to help writers develop their online presence via the little hashtag, #FridayFlash. The response has been tremendous, with hundreds of people participating over the three plus years we’ve been doing this, many on a regular basis. Since its inception on May 29th of 2009 we have gone on to expand to Facebook, Google Plus, and launched this website. The goal of all these efforts is to help you develop a bit of a following in order to expand your base, while encouraging you to continue to develop your voice and skills as a writer. Toward that end we attempt to provide you with with relevant and worthwhile content on a weekly basis with the Friday Flash Report, the News Flash, and one writing related article each Thursday.

Estrella has been doing a bang up job as our Editor keeping this site fresh and alive week in and week out. However, in order for her to continue to bring you fresh content each week we need contributors to fill the bill. While we have wonderful contributors, both regular and periodic, who share their thoughts with you on a continuing basis we are beginning to feel the pinch for fresh content. Some of our contributing writers have had changes in circumstance, myself included, which prevent them from posting on a regular basis. As a result the number of articles available to fill the editorial calendar is dwindling, and we may not be able to continue to supply fresh content each week without your help.

While this presents us with an editorial challenge, it provides you with a bit of an opportunity.

If you are a current or former member of the Friday Flash community, and you would like to help contribute to the cause, please consider contributing an article or two for our Thursday feature post. We will consider any nonfiction writing related piece that is original, thoughtful, and well written.

Some of the topics we will consider include, but are not limited to:

  • General writing tips
  • Challenges presented by your current writing project, and how you overcame them
  • Reviews on writer’s workshops or conferences you’ve attended
  • Your personal writing environment – how you make it work
  • Reviews of books on the craft of writing that you have read — what advice worked, what did you find lacking
  • Success stories – thoughts on your first sale, NaNoWriMo, how you got published or landed an agent, your journey as an indie author

We cannot pay you except via your name on the byline, your bio in the footer, and our eternal gratitude.

If you are interested in contributing to Friday Flalsh Dot Org with an article on writing related topics please contact Estrella or me via email or a Twitter DM and we will give it every consideration as a potential article in one of the upcoming Thursday slots.  

Thanks, and keep on writing.

———————————————

Contact info:

estrella.azul@ffdo.org

@EstrellaAzul on Twitter
@jmstro on Twitter

 

As a Writer, How to be Prolific – Part Two

April 11, 2013 in Thursday Writing, Tips and Suggestions, Writers by Alex Carrick

If you have not read it yet, you can find here Part One of  “As a Writer, How to be Prolific”.

(4) Free associate. This can be important both in non-fiction and freer-content writing. Looking back, I realize I have been lucky to be an economist. To fulfill my function properly, I have been forced – although it’s been more self-imposed rather than dictated by my bosses – to compose an article on one aspect of the economy or another every day for years. That alone has helped me focus.

But there is another side-benefit to being an economist. My profession understands there are interconnections between everything, no matter how unlikely they may seem. Weather patterns in far off places cause certain commodity prices to move up or down. A shift in interest rates in Japan might send the greenback on a shuddering roller-coaster ride.

In my non-fiction writing, I employ free association all the time. It adds color and depth to my articles. For example, if I am writing a story about the latest retail trade numbers issued by the Census Bureau, I will often also mention what’s happening on the inflation front. If imported clothing prices are dropping, that might well influence buying patterns. Or if the price of gasoline is skyrocketing, there will be less money available to spend in other areas, such as on entertainment and meals out.

Or to make the article resonate on a more personal level, perhaps there should be a sidebar about my latest trip to the drug store during which I discovered, to my great chagrin and disappointment, the price of adult diapers had doubled. Yes, I’m just kidding, for now at least.

Blogging has changed non-fiction writing. There’s less emphasis on dry facts everywhere in the media. The shift has been towards expressing an opinion. Don’t be hesitant about speaking out.

(5) What may not be as obvious is the degree to which professional writers free associate in their fictional works as well. This leads to my next point: rely on your memory. Say you have a character in your story and you are having trouble bringing him or her to life. Let your mind roam. Think of an interesting anecdote that is revealing about your own personality or someone you know. You may want to change the names and alter the circumstances – after all, who wants to be sued? Then eagerly assign the incident to your “fictitious” players. It will humanize them and make them more believable.

A good imagination is a great quality to have as a writer. Where does it come from? How can it be strengthened? Nothing adds originality to your material like free associating. You are the only one with “your” thoughts in “your” head. If you can harness them and externalize them properly, then you’ll automatically come up with something fresh to say. Did you like my Pet Sematary reference in point (1)? If so, I have proved my point.

(6) Do your homework before you start writing. Have the research already under your belt. That way you will not be stopped in your tracks every time you want to add an embellishment. A corollary is to know your subject. It’ll provide you with confidence.

That is it for now. I am not going to agonize over additional points or force you to labor through more of my arguments. Let’s let this piece fly and see if she takes wings.

Perhaps you are still in doubt about whether or not being prolific is even a desirable goal. Consider this.

There’s an old saying that captures a basic truth – if you want something done quickly and right, ask a busy person to do it.

As a Writer, How to be Prolific – Part One

April 4, 2013 in Thursday Writing, Tips and Suggestions, Writers by Alex Carrick

The title of this article, “As a Writer, How to be Prolific”, is presumptuous in several ways.

First, it assumes being prolific is something you, the reader who’s also a writer, might want to become. Maybe you’d rather doddle over your manuscript and revise, revise and revise again until it has reached “perfection”.

On many occasions, however, that’s not really the desirable approach. Especially if you are being paid for your material and a deadline is looming. Or perhaps you are doing something for a friend or colleague and feel a sense of responsibility to provide the final copy in a timely fashion. Or better yet, you simply want to get your words out into the public sphere as often as possible.

Second, I set a personal goal to produce this article rather quickly. If I am not able to pull it off, then I will be faced with an awkward question, “Do I know what I’m talking about?” So here goes. Let’s assume you do want to acquire a reputation for producing quality material in abundance.

The following are my suggestions on how to achieve your goal.

(1) Learn how to touch type. This may seem rinky-dink, but believe me, it’s not! To my mind this is absolutely crucial. It has been critically important in my own working life as a professional economist. It is (almost) never too late to learn. When I was in my early 40′s, I switched employers. I was moving to a new job where I would be doing a lot more writing. There was only one way I’d be able to keep up with the work load and that would be to transcribe my thoughts directly from my mind to a computer screen.

Consequently, I enrolled in a Saturday morning business class on keyboarding. After the three hour session, I’d go home and spend another hour practicing. I followed a daily routine during the work week of clicking away whenever I could at lunch time or after dinner. I started typing my way through Stephen King’s novel, Pet Sematary. By the time I was on page 100, the muscle memory in my dancing fingers was firmly embedded.

(2) Do not prevaricate. Take action. Sit down and watch your words appear on the screen. In the old days, such an affirmative step was known as putting something on paper. You have to begin somewhere. Leap in. Revise and polish later. Do this often enough, and you will discover your first drafts begin to take shape better than you ever thought possible.

There is always the option to revise. But I’d be cautious about being a fanatic about it. Make sure the flow is good and the grammar correct; that your arguments follow logically; and there are reasons for the reader to move from one paragraph to the next. But also keep in mind you’re not really likely to become the next James Joyce. Please, no hisses or boos here. I am only sharing a conversation I have with myself quite frequently.

(3) During your free time, read like a banshee. I am assuming, perhaps erroneously, that banshees are bookworms. I’m sure you get my drift in any event. Keep up with the news. The very good reason for this – beyond enjoyment and staying current – is my next point.

Stay tuned for Part Two, next Thursday.

April Days Every Writer should Celebrate

March 28, 2013 in Holidays = Inspiration, Thursday Writing, Tips and Suggestions by Catherine Russell

Everyone knows the big holidays, whether they celebrate them or not. Unless you are living somewhere remote, like the moon, pretty much everyone understands the concept of setting aside special days. So in the interest of feeding your muse machine (my muse is a robot), why not take the time to observe some of the less popular celebrations?

National Poetry Month from the Academy of American Poets

There’s no reason Americans should have all the fun! So whether you decide to break out your Robert Frost anthology or write a poem per day, do something to commemorate Calliope’s favorite month.

1 April Fool’S Day

The name says it all, folks. Practical jokes can be very inspirational. My favorite fictional practical joker is Jim on The Office, but if you aren’t into putting staplers into jello, feel free to fill the salt container with sugar or plant a whoopy cushion in your boss’s chair. He has a sense of humor; right?*

6th Plan Your Epitaph Day

This may be one of the coolest obscure holidays EVER. Seriously, it’s like it was created with writers in mind. And while there is some debate as to which day is officially the day to plan your epitaph, why not just do it today? After all, it’s your last words, inscribed forever on a stone. Do you want posterity to know what type of person you are, or just leave ‘em laughing? Don’t leave it up to someone else. Go for it.

14th through the 20th National Library Week

Technically it’s not a holiday, especially since it’s a whole week. Then again, in my humble opinion, we need more days devoted to celebrating books. So stop in to your local library, or even visit their website, and find out what you can do to promote and celebrate these marvelous institutions.

15th TAX DAY

Death and Taxes? Almost as somber as ‘Plan your epitaph’ day, US citizens need to have their tax forms turned in to Uncle Sam by this ‘deadline’ or face the consequences. Take some of the edge off by doing something fun but tax-themed, like… well, I can’t think of anything, but therein lies the challenge.

22nd Earth Day

An annual holiday since 1970, Earth Day primarily focuses on support for protecting the environment. So whether you decide to bring your own coffee cup to work, start using reusable totes to shop, give up meat for a day, or write a story or poem dedicated to Mother Earth, do something to promote environmental awareness.

23rd World Book Night

This began as a UK event, then spread to the US. While I realize it’s not a ‘holiday’ in the strictest sense, why shouldn’t we all celebrate our love of books? Many reading programs aim at getting children interested in reading, but World Book Night targets adults. Participants give away copies of books they love to adults they think might enjoy them, the gateway drug of literature. And while it’s too late to ‘officially’ become a World Book Night participant if you haven’t already signed up, there’s no reason you can’t do something similar on your own. So grab a copy of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (or whatever book you adore) and give copies out to complete strangers. It’s a wonderfully satisfying experience.

23rd Shakespeare’s Birthday

While the actual date of the Bard’s birth is unknown, he was christened on April 26th, leading historians to guess that he was born on the 23rd. See a play, read a biography, or speak in Shakespeare quotes all day long, but don’t forget to celebrate the life and work of the Bard of Avon.

26th Arbor Day

In the United States, this traditionally falls on the last Friday in April, when conscientious citizens take it upon themselves to plant a tree. Not that ambitious? Plant a seed or write a poem about trees!

There are enough obscure holidays to celebrate each calendar day, many times over, but I’ve simply picked out some of my favorites. If you want to look up others, check out Holiday Insights, Fun and Obscure Holidays, and this fun post at Families.com. Of course, you could always make up your own.

*That was a joke. Please don’t get fired or sent to the hospital because of a practical joke! Use common sense and be careful of your friends’ and coworkers’ safety.

**image courtesy of Cornell University Library via Flickr. No known copyright restrictions.

Take a Moment to Write a Curious List Today

March 21, 2013 in Editorial - of Sorts, Gifts for writers, Writing Fun by Estrella Azul

Because I thought, today we could try something completely different.

I am a list lover. Not the To-Do List lover, which tends to grow rapidly and even without my approval. But a list lover nonetheless.

Ever since my friend, Judy Clement Wall, mentioned being gifted with the “Curious Lists – A Creative Journal for List Lovers”, I have had it on my wish list. That was back in 2009. This past Valentine’s Day, I got to choose a couple of things from my wish list for gifts – and went with the Curious Lists journal. It is one amazing gift!

The book is small, will easily fit into my purse. It is divided into 26 chapters, like “Lists for Boring Meetings”, “Lists for When You’re on the Phone”,  “Lists for Right Now”, and “Lists for When You’re on the Bus” (with my commute, that tends to be a lot of the time). In each chapter list titles are given and the contents are to be written by the reader. As of first opening it, I am enchanted, captivated, and simply in love with this book! I couldn’t wait to give it a try and see if friends wanted to join in on the fun. We had a blast!

So let’s have some fun today and write a Curious List together. I will write my list below, and you let me know in the comment section what Your own lists would look like. Deal?

I opened the book at random, to page 169 and the chose the bottom left list title, from the chapter “Lists for Vacations”.

Unwise Impersonations to Perform in a Public Bath: 

  • Bugs Bunny, looking around shamelessly while asking “What’s up Doc?”
  • A police officer, saying “Stick’em up!”
  • Paul Castellano from  Boss of Bosses: The FBI and Paul Castellano, asking “Who wants to sleep with the fishes?”

What other unwise impersonations to perform in a public bath can You think of?

An Editor of Unawkwardifying

March 14, 2013 in Thursday Writing, Tips and Suggestions, Writers by Alex Carrick

Are you wondering what separates an amateur writer from a professional?

In fiction, either long-story format or shorter works, there are many answers:

  • Research into the setting and background is certainly a key element.
  • The use of language is another.
  • Engaging characters that the reader becomes emotionally attached to is a third.
  • Also add to the list the ability to write realistic dialogue.

From a purely technical standpoint, a key ingredient shows up in the flow:

  • The way the words chug along. The inevitable manner in which each set of phrases, sentences and paragraphs follow one another.
  • It’s also the surprises one encounters along the way.

So that is what I’m going to explore today, the latter two points, and how to make sure your writing has a professional gloss. And it is not about using big words or sounding smart. In fact, the very best writing comes across as so “whole”, it seems it must have been easy to write. One might even say there can be an innocence about it.

It’s similar to the best acting. Flawless. Perhaps the effect is better expressed as being natural. One does not see the artifice behind it. You forget the real-life actor and only pay attention to the character he or she is portraying. That is what you as an author want to achieve – a smoothness that’s deceptive. You want to trick the reader into not being aware of the effort behind the work.

The best writers will tell you they revise and revise and then revise again. They keep reading what they have written to make sure it sounds good in their own heads. Then they read it out loud, preferably to an audience. That’s when difficult or questionable phrasing becomes most apparent. If you stumble over a passage when speaking the words, it undoubtedly needs fixing.

It is also a good idea to have someone – who’s opinion you respect – go over the nearly final draft as well. They may spot something you have overlooked. I’ll certainly have my wife Donna read this article. She will offer suggestions and we won’t speak for a few days, but it will be worth it. Right honey? Sweetheart, where are you? Did she just leave the house and slam the door?

Often a word will have more than one meaning. You, the author, have used it in a certain context, knowing exactly what you mean. Someone else, who does not share your mind, may think of another usage and be baffled. Action passages are particularly open to misinterpretation. It is hard to compress a great deal of activity into a few sentences and confusion can be the result. If you feel you may have fallen into this trap, simplify and strive for clarity.

Now I come to a particular beef of mine. There is at least one sure give-away that a budding author is inexperienced. The old saying is true: everyone does have a story to tell. But please don’t do it with sentences that are simply a string of clichés.

When a tale unfolds through the use of every hoary old phrase imaginable, I quickly become bored. It’s hard not to fall into this trap. We use phrases in the vernacular to such a degree they spill out onto the page.

  • “The sun appeared like a red rubber ball on the day Jesse hot-wired the Chevy.”
  • “The squat pawnbroker was round as a beach ball with a bald pate that shone like a golf ball.”

Excessive appearances of the words “like” and “as” are sure signs you may be straying into banal territory. Try to catch yourself and offer the reader something new. For example,

  • “The quarter-moon hung like an albino banana against a black-velvet background on the night Big Bertha met her myopic maker.”

Watch for the same word repeated over and over, maybe even within a single sentence. The beauty of the English language is that there are many alternative ways of saying the same thing. Words that are a little out of the ordinary, if repeated often enough, will reduce a reader to giggles each time they’re spotted. Nobody should “grimace” more than once in a novel or short story or undertake something – indeed, anything – with “concomitant” effects.

Now that I have exorcised those bees from my bonnet – whoops! – I mean hornets from my hairpiece, I would like to mention another of my pet peeves, plot lines which mimic other more successful stories.

I don’t want to read a story that simply tweaks the “Twilight” saga. Or plays a riff on the Hunger Games. Or turns a Shade of Gray into varying degrees of off-chartreuse or a deeper maroon. Those books have had their successful runs. Yes, their story arcs employ traditional themes, but they are combined in unique modern ways.

Do not give a vampire an extra fang and expect everyone to lap it up. Sorry again. “Suck it back with a right incisor.”

It is time to wrap up my rant with a quick summary: Simplify, strive for a smooth flow, avoid cliché phrasing and squeeze your brain hard until it spits out something original.

What right do I have to offer such advice? When I posed that question to myself, I was at first stumped. Then it came to me. If I had to choose an alternative profession I’d like to pursue, as opposed to being an economist, the answer is easy.

I think I’m ideally suited to be an “Editor of Unawkwardifying”.

 

*image via Google Images, found here, no known copyright.